This madness

A slide into madness.  Darkness lingers muddling fantasy with reality betrayal in the shadows.  Her eyes and voice and touch feel real.  Her descent hidden from prying eyes.  Words that hurt fierce piercing.  He says she was his favorite.  She preaches prosaic her darling baby.  None are you.  You give.  You bleed.

Hand held you wish upon yesterday dreams. You felt loved.  She screams.  You are a failure.  You need help.  You smile.  A façade of acceptance begging serenity wanting pleading an escape where your tears can fall freely.  Sorrow is deep evil whispering, pressing taking more of your sanity your peace.

I am alone.  That which rooted me is no longer.  Adrift the sandalwood tosses about gently pushing against the tide washing into the shore.  I seek connection in chaos wanting stability in false relationships rather finding refuge in what perhaps I cannot have.  Orphaned, I am free but am tethered to the burdens of my original keepers. 

Who celebrates me?  When is it my turn to dance my evolution underscored in a symphony of music.  My freedom within my grasp dare I breathe needing only to reach.  In this new normal who claims me?  She is unhappy.  Her soul cries for the familiar.  She suffers from a life forced.  Who owns her unhappiness?  I beg to be free. I beg for my self.